








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1349 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1011 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




80 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10977 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 49,507 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 23620 | 48% |
| Smokes | 9597 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 10666 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5624 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,288,288 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1193 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Life | 64% | 123 |
| #2 | Olly | 64% | 67 |
| #3 | TriGGeR<3 | 62% | 133 |
| #4 | suicidal potato | 60% | 75 |
| #5 | Bruman | 56% | 421 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Buzzd | 54% | 253 |
| #9 | Phr33k | 53% | 178 |
| #10 | BombVoyage | 53% | 232 |
| #11 | Totimeister | 51% | 97 |
| #12 | :D | 43% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bruman | 54 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | SloppY | 36 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | Buzzd | 13 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | BombVoyage | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Life | 8 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TriGGeR<3 | +3.83 | 88 | 40 |
| #2 | Life | +2.03 | 74 | 72 |
| #3 | Totimeister | +1.95 | 74 | 56 |
| #4 | SloppY | +1.73 | 66 | 58 |
| #5 | Buzzd | +1.62 | 54 | 39 |





