








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,543 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 802 | 32% |
| Smokes | 631 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 468 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 642 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $312,331 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vye | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | mills | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Cybopig | 54% | 26 |
| #4 | Clearly KennyS | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | Yuh | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cybopig | 221 | 0.35 | 5 min |
| #2 | Yuh | 59 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | Sto0kerz | 51 | 0.36 | 2 min |
| #4 | ROWDY.CS | 50 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Clearly KennyS | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vye | +6.08 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | mills | +2.65 | 74 | 80 |
| #3 | Cybopig | +1.84 | 66 | 69 |
| #4 | Char | +0.44 | 79 | 52 |
| #5 | Sto0kerz | +0.39 | 58 | 74 |





