








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
745 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,365 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 503 | 37% |
| Smokes | 254 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 559 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 49 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $468,277 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 257 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PISS | 34% | 70 |
| #2 | Cuzinho | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | Duncan | 32% | 25 |
| #4 | Shugger | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PISS | 34% | 70 |
| #2 | Cuzinho | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | Duncan | 32% | 25 |
| #4 | Shugger | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PISS | 8 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Shugger | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PISS | 304 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | Shugger | 108 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #3 | Duncan | 55 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Cuzinho | 35 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cuzinho | +1.85 | 65 | 73 |
| #2 | PISS | +1.42 | 57 | 52 |
| #3 | Duncan | +1.27 | 51 | 60 |
| #4 | BIG SCRIPPER | -1.23 | 53 | 44 |
| #5 | Shugger | -1.86 | 52 | 61 |





