








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 225 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1250 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1337 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1005 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 739 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 846 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $241,325 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | powerstache1[ak] | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | schweinsteiger | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | aimex | 68% | 28 |
| #4 | 4sh0t | 68% | 31 |
| #5 | krz | 67% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | PzMuffin | 67% | 12 |
| #7 | BARRAGE | 58% | 33 |
| #8 | sideSWIPE | 56% | 9 |
| #9 | adept | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | planks | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimex | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | BARRAGE | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | 4sh0t | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | PzMuffin | 1 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | adept | 1 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimex | 237 | 0.38 | 8 min |
| #2 | 4sh0t | 166 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #3 | BARRAGE | 159 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #4 | krz | 62 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #5 | PzMuffin | 37 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cjb | +2.76 | 88 | 71 |
| #2 | krz | +2.24 | 86 | 70 |
| #3 | PzMuffin | +1.70 | 81 | 65 |
| #4 | 4sh0t | +1.64 | 83 | 63 |
| #5 | aimex | +1.21 | 69 | 75 |





