








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 160 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 323 | 18% |
| Smokes | 535 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 762 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 151 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $459,983 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mighty Shrimp | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | HitzK0pf | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | Lara | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Tyrone | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | ✘ Lineo ✘ | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mighty Shrimp | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | HitzK0pf | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | Lara | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Tyrone | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | ✘ Lineo ✘ | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✘ Lineo ✘ | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Mighty Shrimp | 1 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HitzK0pf | 106 | 0.29 | 4 min |
| #2 | ✘ Lineo ✘ | 20 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Tyrone | 15 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Lara | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Mighty Shrimp | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HitzK0pf | +4.15 | 66 | 77 |
| #2 | ✘ Lineo ✘ | -0.36 | 44 | 51 |
| #3 | Tyrone | -0.43 | 49 | 54 |
| #4 | p4sc | -0.61 | 38 | 48 |
| #5 | Lara | -2.27 | 71 | 34 |





