










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 62 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
476 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,608 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 868 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1098 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 797 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 845 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $162,723 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Audr | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | Istoriks | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | Death Hand | 44% | 16 |
| #4 | Nyuu | 43% | 23 |
| #5 | Vadzila | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Nyuu | 43% | 23 |
| #5 | Vadzila | 42% | 26 |
| #6 | bradcop | 38% | 13 |
| #7 | Nura | 38% | 21 |
| #8 | Pendels | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Audr | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Vadzila | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Istoriks | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | bradcop | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vadzila | 83 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | Nura | 69 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Death Hand | 63 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | Audr | 24 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | bradcop | 23 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vadzila | +2.51 | 54 | 63 |
| #2 | Audr | +1.92 | 61 | 41 |
| #3 | bradcop | +1.51 | 61 | 75 |
| #4 | Nura | +1.22 | 56 | 73 |
| #5 | Death Hand | +0.71 | 75 | 75 |





