








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 356 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Wingman | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,321 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4599 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2267 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2805 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2650 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $686,331 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 730 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juleez | 64% | 102 |
| #2 | Chopi | 58% | 26 |
| #3 | ✞. martin | 50% | 122 |
| #4 | Lindgaard | 49% | 57 |
| #5 | M.L | 49% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ✞. martin | 50% | 122 |
| #4 | Lindgaard | 49% | 57 |
| #5 | M.L | 49% | 57 |
| #6 | Explosion | 48% | 123 |
| #7 | Pedersen | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✞. martin | 17 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Explosion | 10 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Juleez | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Pedersen | 4 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | Lindgaard | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juleez | 340 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | ✞. martin | 299 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | Explosion | 178 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | M.L | 115 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Lindgaard | 47 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juleez | +3.72 | 87 | 70 |
| #2 | BegK | +1.08 | 64 | 63 |
| #3 | Explosion | +0.59 | 64 | 55 |
| #4 | M.L | +0.57 | 78 | 53 |
| #5 | ✞. martin | -0.64 | 50 | 56 |





