








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 403 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2128 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1760 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1427 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1722 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1727 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $681,762 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 369 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dark_Zoroa | 62% | 50 |
| #2 | Jostrex | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | nath | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | Svetlana | 58% | 19 |
| #5 | ✪ Mats | 55% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Mats | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Blarnie Blarnacle | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Dark_Zoroa | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | monke | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Svetlana | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Mats | 251 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | Dark_Zoroa | 82 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Svetlana | 68 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | Blarnie Blarnacle | 60 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | nath | 59 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ArveFraKenya | +2.22 | 51 | 64 |
| #2 | monke | +1.87 | 83 | 48 |
| #3 | ✪ Mats | +1.30 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | nath | +0.48 | 58 | 58 |
| #5 | Svetlana | -1.40 | 29 | 60 |





