








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1069 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,875 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1020 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1129 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1324 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1402 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $378,403 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 488 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Napu | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | uderio | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | Miksujr | 53% | 15 |
| #4 | Janski | 43% | 14 |
| #5 | Amisniper | 42% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Snapu | 41% | 110 |
| #7 | Günther | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | riksa | 40% | 43 |
| #9 | beazil | 39% | 100 |
| #10 | Jokinenn | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riksa | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Jokinenn | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Snapu | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | beazil | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Amisniper | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Amisniper | 313 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | beazil | 166 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Snapu | 140 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Miksujr | 45 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jokinenn | 44 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miksujr | +2.89 | 57 | 68 |
| #2 | Janski | +1.53 | 43 | 20 |
| #3 | Napu | +1.36 | 57 | 42 |
| #4 | Snapu | +0.85 | 50 | 51 |
| #5 | Günther | +0.27 | 29 | 47 |





