








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 603 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 751 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,040 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2680 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4447 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3332 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3581 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,821,256 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 357 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beazil | 44% | 199 |
| #2 | Snapu | 41% | 333 |
| #3 | Jokinenn | 37% | 112 |
| #4 | Amisniper | 35% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beazil | 44% | 199 |
| #2 | Snapu | 41% | 333 |
| #3 | Jokinenn | 37% | 112 |
| #4 | Amisniper | 35% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snapu | 10 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Jokinenn | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Amisniper | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | beazil | 2 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snapu | 640 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #2 | Jokinenn | 302 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | Amisniper | 292 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | beazil | 255 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snapu | +2.69 | 52 | 50 |
| #2 | Jokinenn | +0.08 | 32 | 50 |
| #3 | Amisniper | -0.20 | 42 | 44 |
| #4 | beazil | -0.32 | 29 | 61 |
| #5 | riksa | -4.63 | 13 | 29 |





