








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 146 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,121 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 629 | 15% |
| Smokes | 656 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1304 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1532 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $627,549 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | tumblevalley | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | Nemo | 53% | 15 |
| #6 | SalmoN | 48% | 60 |
| #7 | Pizzasnurr | 46% | 28 |
| #8 | Godfaren | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SalmoN | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | tumblevalley | 2 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | silenT_ | 2 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | Pizzasnurr | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Nemo | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SalmoN | 236 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kjaer | 90 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | silenT_ | 69 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | Pizzasnurr | 53 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Godfaren | 46 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | silenT_ | +3.56 | 81 | 85 |
| #2 | SalmoN | +1.97 | 75 | 72 |
| #3 | Godfaren | +1.97 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | tumblevalley | +1.57 | 44 | 60 |
| #5 | Kjaer | +1.25 | 75 | 67 |





