








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 236 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1183 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,322 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 282 | 12% |
| Smokes | 464 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 834 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 742 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $774,507 of utility $268 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | \ Emilkfp / | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Monkey!<3 | 59% | 34 |
| #4 | Topper | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | Dibberdini | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | l'sh88 | 250 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | Amela | 87 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | s | 60 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Monkey!<3 | 47 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dibberdini | 39 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | +2.53 | 91 | 61 |
| #2 | Topper | +1.87 | 45 | 60 |
| #3 | l'sh88 | +1.58 | 91 | 61 |
| #4 | ✪Lupo | +1.55 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | Monkey!<3 | +1.45 | 64 | 63 |





