








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 261 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 80 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2388 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,991 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1384 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1397 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1125 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1085 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,205 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fibonacci | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | budbud | 68% | 56 |
| #3 | Dragon180 | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | wYmk0nG | 63% | 19 |
| #5 | zondor | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Wicked180 | 58% | 78 |
| #9 | Tofuritter | 56% | 18 |
| #10 | Blu3Eye | 55% | 42 |
| #11 | Krizzel [òÓ] | 55% | 11 |
| #12 | MUSHU BICEPS #PewPew | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wicked180 | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | budbud | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | zondor | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | B!mm3L___ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Blu3Eye | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wicked180 | 216 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | B!mm3L___ | 113 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | budbud | 98 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | Blu3Eye | 72 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tofuritter | 62 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .TaBa | +3.56 | 91 | 63 |
| #2 | Tofuritter | +1.13 | 84 | 64 |
| #3 | Wicked180 | +0.30 | 57 | 72 |
| #4 | B!mm3L___ | -0.28 | 53 | 69 |
| #5 | Blu3Eye | -0.35 | 84 | 63 |





