








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3790 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,795 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2922 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2866 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3408 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3599 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,408,683 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drizzonya | 60% | 97 |
| #2 | Lj3 | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | thebiggestantt | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | CreeperCharlie16 | 54% | 46 |
| #5 | boof | 52% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bad | 18 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | ProbablyZachGG | 12 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Drizzonya | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | CreeperCharlie16 | 8 | 0.0083 |
| #5 | Lj3 | 3 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProbablyZachGG | 277 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Drizzonya | 230 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | CreeperCharlie16 | 208 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | Bad | 164 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #5 | boof | 119 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | killallmytroubles | +2.43 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | thebiggestantt | +2.35 | 89 | 63 |
| #3 | JoeyMinecraft18 | +2.19 | 73 | 67 |
| #4 | Drizzonya | +0.33 | 58 | 57 |
| #5 | Bad | -0.93 | 62 | 44 |





