








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,562 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 502 | 20% |
| Smokes | 972 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 477 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 611 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $428,302 of utility $216 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☭ Villenogger 梦 | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | KiURRY | 50% | 62 |
| #3 | glennka | 49% | 65 |
| #4 | IEatGlue | 45% | 42 |
| #5 | Xistenz | 45% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☭ Villenogger 梦 | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | KiURRY | 50% | 62 |
| #3 | glennka | 49% | 65 |
| #4 | IEatGlue | 45% | 42 |
| #5 | Xistenz | 45% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KiURRY | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glennka | 253 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | Xistenz | 228 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | KiURRY | 120 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | IEatGlue | 21 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | ☭ Villenogger 梦 | 18 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glennka | +2.01 | 61 | 64 |
| #2 | ☭ Villenogger 梦 | +1.99 | 84 | 45 |
| #3 | Xistenz | +0.28 | 44 | 66 |
| #4 | IEatGlue | -0.08 | 70 | 51 |
| #5 | Ethan | -0.88 | 54 | 43 |





