








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1420 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,296 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 67 | 2% |
| Smokes | 1203 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1086 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 940 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $397,617 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prime Rabba | 56% | 18 |
| #2 | Smurfin Dun | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | Ms. JackedCat | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Single Raccoons In Your Area | 50% | 103 |
| #5 | Rohannes | 47% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Single Raccoons In Your Area | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Rohannes | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Smurfin Dun | 3 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | LukynS38 | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Ms. JackedCat | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smurfin Dun | +3.47 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | Single Raccoons In Your Area | +2.55 | 65 | 66 |
| #3 | Rohannes | +1.66 | 62 | 72 |
| #4 | tofuskie | +1.37 | 58 | 67 |
| #5 | W4rgonix ツ | -0.23 | 54 | 30 |





