








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 30 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 25 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
247 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 861 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 200 | 23% |
| Smokes | 246 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 283 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 132 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $105,762 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bytER | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | dᴀlt | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | ♛DD♛ | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | BakedKiller | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | Lebe | 63% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | 7 | 63% | 8 |
| #7 | Robsberg | 58% | 12 |
| #8 | legit bile taneli | 57% | 7 |
| #9 | Harzza | 56% | 9 |
| #10 | Lenyalt haj nevü strici | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7 | 1 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7 | 49 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #2 | Harzza | 39 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | Lebe | 21 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | bytER | 20 | 0.30 | 1 min |
| #5 | legit bile taneli | 18 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7 | +3.65 | 81 | 83 |
| #2 | ♛DD♛ | +3.63 | 94 | 57 |
| #3 | Harzza | +2.95 | 71 | 79 |
| #4 | Robsberg | +1.82 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | Lenyalt haj nevü strici | +1.71 | 83 | 80 |





