








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 216 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 188 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2414 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,952 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2870 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3871 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3446 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2765 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $447,868 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | No Aim Dude | 50% | 180 |
| #6 | Alex | 49% | 196 |
| #7 | tbdgr | 49% | 41 |
| #8 | Toph | 48% | 77 |
| #9 | Mike-quil | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alex | 10 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | No Aim Dude | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Mike-quil | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | THE Glizzily | 3 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | Toph | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alex | 642 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #2 | No Aim Dude | 566 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | tbdgr | 100 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | 2phoenix4 | 66 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Toph | 40 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dixter | +2.32 | 77 | 70 |
| #2 | No Aim Dude | +1.73 | 65 | 61 |
| #3 | 2phoenix4 | +0.10 | 60 | 46 |
| #4 | Toph | -0.47 | 49 | 30 |
| #5 | Alex | -1.91 | 37 | 58 |





