








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 232 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3089 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2683 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2028 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 5003 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 3036 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $534,169 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .JSON | 9 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | AL_stair | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Chalupa Batmang | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | ShinyShores | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | 12 fl oz | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AL_stair | 134 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #2 | Chalupa Batmang | 87 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | 12 fl oz | 62 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | .JSON | 54 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | ShinyShores | 42 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 12 fl oz | +1.25 | 63 | 51 |
| #2 | Chalupa Batmang | +0.55 | 63 | 62 |
| #3 | AL_stair | +0.15 | 52 | 61 |
| #4 | ShinyShores | +0.08 | 60 | 40 |
| #5 | .JSON | +0.07 | 41 | 51 |





