








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 505 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 351 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6587 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,347 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4153 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5467 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5808 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4919 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,249,035 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | madb0y_ | 66% | 88 |
| #2 | Nörte | 65% | 55 |
| #3 | kyrox | 64% | 42 |
| #4 | Sad | 63% | 48 |
| #5 | cuntlord-_- | 62% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | jics | 59% | 174 |
| #9 | TGB | 57% | 40 |
| #10 | Crankill | 55% | 56 |
| #11 | DrnknSqurrl | 51% | 86 |
| #12 | Lapiru | 37% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bott9mfragger_13 ☂ | 10 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | jics | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | cuntlord-_- | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Sad | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | madb0y_ | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jics | 500 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #2 | bott9mfragger_13 ☂ | 249 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | madb0y_ | 215 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | kyrox | 200 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #5 | cuntlord-_- | 190 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sad | +5.99 | 93 | 63 |
| #2 | cuntlord-_- | +3.67 | 92 | 68 |
| #3 | ✪ h1dd3n | +3.47 | 94 | 63 |
| #4 | kyrox | +2.99 | 85 | 77 |
| #5 | bott9mfragger_13 ☂ | +2.09 | 88 | 77 |





