








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 133 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1073 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1374 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1852 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1867 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1686 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $735,114 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VOLDO | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | wRoNg | 68% | 19 |
| #3 | Saaq | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Flatsplat | 50% | 163 |
| #5 | Special Tactics | 50% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VOLDO | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | wRoNg | 68% | 19 |
| #3 | Saaq | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Flatsplat | 50% | 163 |
| #5 | Special Tactics | 50% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flatsplat | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Special Tactics | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | wRoNg | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | VOLDO | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flatsplat | 491 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #2 | Special Tactics | 297 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | wRoNg | 55 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | Saaq | 35 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | VOLDO | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Special Tactics | +3.76 | 73 | 69 |
| #2 | Saaq | +2.59 | 88 | 59 |
| #3 | wRoNg | +1.20 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | VOLDO | -0.92 | 41 | 58 |
| #5 | Flatsplat | -0.95 | 63 | 61 |





