








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 266 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2461 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,853 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2607 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2212 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2348 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1686 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,078,595 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | harka | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | wRoNg | 69% | 16 |
| #3 | VOLDO | 62% | 34 |
| #4 | Saaq | 58% | 62 |
| #5 | Special Tactics | 52% | 216 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | wRoNg | 69% | 16 |
| #3 | VOLDO | 62% | 34 |
| #4 | Saaq | 58% | 62 |
| #5 | Special Tactics | 52% | 216 |
| #6 | Mousn | 50% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Special Tactics | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | VOLDO | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Mousn | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | Saaq | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | wRoNg | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Special Tactics | 458 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | Mousn | 300 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | Saaq | 70 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | wRoNg | 50 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | VOLDO | 38 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Special Tactics | +3.64 | 72 | 70 |
| #2 | Saaq | +2.25 | 87 | 57 |
| #3 | wRoNg | +1.70 | 70 | 63 |
| #4 | harka | -0.00 | 68 | 71 |
| #5 | Flatsplat | -0.84 | 63 | 60 |





