








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,855 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1687 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2603 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2316 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1249 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $864,300 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNGNIK | 52% | 113 |
| #2 | elblanko | 51% | 83 |
| #3 | flowceps | 48% | 124 |
| #4 | Mr.Clausen | 48% | 81 |
| #5 | luludag | 47% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNGNIK | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | flowceps | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | elblanko | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Mr.Clausen | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | luludag | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | elblanko | 316 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #2 | YUNGNIK | 200 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | luludag | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | flowceps | 84 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mr.Clausen | 78 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNGNIK | +3.06 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | Mr.Clausen | +0.65 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | h1lk0'1337 | +0.16 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | flowceps | -0.60 | 68 | 45 |
| #5 | luludag | -0.90 | 70 | 66 |





