








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 952 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 387 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7171 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,667 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4065 | 19% |
| Smokes | 6240 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5506 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5856 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,888,442 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1639 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kropka | 27 | 0.0145 |
| #2 | trix | 24 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | h1x^ | 11 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | GodteP | 10 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | :) | 9 | 0.0121 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trix | 338 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | kropka | 231 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Księżuś | 181 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | :) | 161 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #5 | h1x^ | 159 | 0.06 | 4 min |





