








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 117 | 5% |
| Smokes | 922 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 361 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 816 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $18,233 of utility $10 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Speedy "piri" Gonzales | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Divebomber | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | JEPS=) | 50% | 10 |
| #4 | Kräfi | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | whisi =(^^)= | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Divebomber | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Speedy "piri" Gonzales | 2 | 0.0113 |
| #3 | Kräfi | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | JEPS=) | 1 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | aiv0 | 1 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kräfi | 73 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | Divebomber | 64 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | JEPS=) | 42 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | Speedy "piri" Gonzales | 38 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #5 | BZK =(^^)= | 34 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JEPS=) | +5.67 | 51 | 87 |
| #2 | Divebomber | +5.02 | 57 | 85 |
| #3 | Speedy "piri" Gonzales | +2.90 | 40 | 89 |
| #4 | BZK =(^^)= | +2.13 | 46 | 65 |
| #5 | SopuliApina | +1.74 | 44 | 48 |





