








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 792 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 582 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




123 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7072 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,828 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2299 | 15% |
| Smokes | 4162 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5738 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 3629 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,560,741 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 828 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maya ♡ | 51% | 55 |
| #2 | high | 49% | 47 |
| #3 | Chrysaora | 49% | 101 |
| #4 | marceline ♡ | 45% | 64 |
| #5 | Batriq Al-Baatman | 45% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | high | 49% | 47 |
| #3 | Chrysaora | 49% | 101 |
| #4 | marceline ♡ | 45% | 64 |
| #5 | Batriq Al-Baatman | 45% | 83 |
| #6 | Rain | 44% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrysaora | 22 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | marceline ♡ | 17 | 0.0137 |
| #3 | Maya ♡ | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Batriq Al-Baatman | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Rain | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrysaora | 170 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #2 | marceline ♡ | 66 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Batriq Al-Baatman | 27 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Rain | 23 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | high | 13 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jackpot | +1.79 | 75 | 42 |
| #2 | Batriq Al-Baatman | +1.11 | 73 | 63 |
| #3 | high | +0.48 | 62 | 23 |
| #4 | marceline ♡ | +0.39 | 70 | 17 |
| #5 | Rain | -0.31 | 66 | 55 |





