








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 98 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 276 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,457 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1378 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1470 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1873 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1736 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $903,459 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _HitmaN_ | 65% | 26 |
| #2 | kiriku | 49% | 141 |
| #3 | Baya. | 47% | 116 |
| #4 | dzman | 47% | 217 |
| #5 | коНе ツ | 47% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | коНе ツ | 47% | 30 |
| #6 | Zlatni™ | 46% | 71 |
| #7 | eXon シ | 45% | 82 |
| #8 | Autokomanda[BG] | 44% | 27 |
| #9 | Thomiy | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dzman | 15 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | kiriku | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | eXon シ | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Autokomanda[BG] | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | Baya. | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dzman | 650 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #2 | Baya. | 283 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | kiriku | 222 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | Zlatni™ | 170 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | eXon シ | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zlatni™ | +0.72 | 74 | 63 |
| #2 | Thomiy | +0.66 | 58 | 59 |
| #3 | eXon シ | +0.55 | 51 | 57 |
| #4 | _HitmaN_ | +0.49 | 65 | 51 |
| #5 | kiriku | +0.46 | 52 | 71 |





