








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 312 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3928 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,950 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2634 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3153 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3220 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2943 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,266,946 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirool | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | topi | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | zarq | 55% | 44 |
| #4 | Migis ヅ | 54% | 85 |
| #5 | JaakkoAA | 53% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ek1makipano | 11 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | JaakkoAA | 10 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Hanski | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Migis ヅ | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | mirool | 4 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ek1makipano | 367 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | Migis ヅ | 250 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | JaakkoAA | 237 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | mirool | 194 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | Hanski | 186 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirool | +5.23 | 77 | 69 |
| #2 | JaakkoAA | +0.86 | 68 | 57 |
| #3 | Ek1makipano | +0.04 | 73 | 57 |
| #4 | ☭TR3☭ | +0.04 | 57 | 61 |
| #5 | zarq | -0.06 | 53 | 53 |





