








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 449 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5623 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,661 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3911 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2229 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 3974 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3547 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,792,421 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 315 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bluu | 59% | 64 |
| #2 | scyie | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | •pürp1εhazε• | 53% | 121 |
| #4 | Laundry | 52% | 58 |
| #5 | Winnie | 50% | 396 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bluu | 59% | 64 |
| #2 | scyie | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | •pürp1εhazε• | 53% | 121 |
| #4 | Laundry | 52% | 58 |
| #5 | Winnie | 50% | 396 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Winnie | 9 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | •pürp1εhazε• | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | bluu | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | scyie | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | •pürp1εhazε• | 388 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | Winnie | 374 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #3 | Laundry | 157 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | bluu | 74 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | scyie | 32 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bluu | +2.31 | 85 | 56 |
| #2 | WillieS | +1.55 | 70 | 52 |
| #3 | Winnie | -0.41 | 66 | 46 |
| #4 | Laundry | -0.45 | 54 | 62 |
| #5 | •pürp1εhazε• | -0.51 | 75 | 63 |





