








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1861 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 241 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 215 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




170 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9179 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,448 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5048 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2244 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 8235 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 4921 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,827,138 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 952 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ry^_^ | 56% | 64 |
| #2 | Kratzy2.0 | 54% | 173 |
| #3 | FezPirate | 52% | 101 |
| #4 | Broken Slinky | 51% | 310 |
| #5 | Ember | 45% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kratzy2.0 | 29 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | Broken Slinky | 15 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | FezPirate | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ry^_^ | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Ember | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kratzy2.0 | 184 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | ry^_^ | 180 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | FezPirate | 125 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Ember | 99 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Broken Slinky | 76 | 0.01 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OOF | +4.77 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | FezPirate | -0.04 | 39 | 66 |
| #3 | ry^_^ | -1.31 | 29 | 62 |
| #4 | Kratzy2.0 | -1.76 | 42 | 60 |
| #5 | Ember | -4.33 | 11 | 51 |





