








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
605 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,133 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 685 | 22% |
| Smokes | 988 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 732 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 728 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $226,471 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OOF | 45% | 71 |
| #2 | Broken Slinky | 43% | 53 |
| #3 | FezPirate | 40% | 48 |
| #4 | Kratzy2.0 | 36% | 11 |
| #5 | ry^_^ | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OOF | 17 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | Broken Slinky | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | FezPirate | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OOF | 141 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | FezPirate | 56 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | ry^_^ | 29 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Broken Slinky | 11 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | Kratzy2.0 | 10 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OOF | +6.38 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | FezPirate | +0.26 | 46 | 65 |
| #3 | ry^_^ | -0.26 | 25 | 57 |
| #4 | Kratzy2.0 | -1.42 | 36 | 56 |
| #5 | Ember | -3.36 | 13 | 54 |





