








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 82 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,273 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4106 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3710 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3262 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2195 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $434,031 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pats Β© | 54% | 268 |
| #2 | Maracuya | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | γπΈππππ‘ΰΏ | 52% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pats Β© | 54% | 268 |
| #2 | Maracuya | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | γπΈππππ‘ΰΏ | 52% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pats Β© | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Maracuya | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pats Β© | 785 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | Maracuya | 77 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | γπΈππππ‘ΰΏ | 75 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maracuya | +2.12 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | Pats Β© | +1.80 | 73 | 69 |
| #3 | γπΈππππ‘ΰΏ | -0.13 | 62 | 69 |
| #4 | leumaS | -0.92 | 61 | 68 |





