








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1010 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,760 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1439 | 38% |
| Smokes | 725 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1095 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 501 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,883 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bubsleton (not skel) | 94% | 16 |
| #2 | kozy ☿ | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | ImAsMurF_Skinhub.com | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | verts | 62% | 74 |
| #5 | JustAPlayer | 52% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verts | 15 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | bubsleton (not skel) | 9 | 0.0280 |
| #3 | JustAPlayer | 5 | 0.0117 |
| #4 | chopsticks | 3 | 0.0210 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verts | 179 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | JustAPlayer | 87 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | kozy ☿ | 25 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #4 | ImAsMurF_Skinhub.com | 19 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #5 | chopsticks | 17 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verts | +3.74 | 79 | 69 |
| #2 | HENTAI-IS-ART | +2.33 | 66 | 66 |
| #3 | ImAsMurF_Skinhub.com | +1.70 | 68 | 45 |
| #4 | kozy ☿ | +1.49 | 63 | 51 |
| #5 | bubsleton (not skel) | +0.51 | 87 | 21 |





