








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 28 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6169 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,124 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3760 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4031 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5507 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3826 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $730,426 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cup | 456 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #2 | HENTAI-IS-ART | 270 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #3 | ImAsMurF_Skinhub.com | 223 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | JustAPlayer | 200 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | kozy ☿ | 159 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verts | +4.52 | 80 | 65 |
| #2 | HENTAI-IS-ART | +1.57 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | Cup | +1.53 | 74 | 46 |
| #4 | ImAsMurF_Skinhub.com | +1.42 | 77 | 53 |
| #5 | JustAPlayer | +0.79 | 83 | 62 |





