








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 572 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 642 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7034 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,591 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5483 | 19% |
| Smokes | 8955 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 7334 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7819 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,476,810 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 418 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _EnergY | 19 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Birixxx cs.money | 11 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | HauDenLukas | 8 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | maxjee | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Bomberpilot | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maxjee | 1063 | 0.14 | 35 min |
| #2 | HauDenLukas | 835 | 0.11 | 25 min |
| #3 | _EnergY | 827 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #4 | Birixxx cs.money | 764 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #5 | Bomberpilot | 416 | 0.15 | 10 min |





