








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 874 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 86 matches | ||
| Wingman | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,306 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2270 | 12% |
| Smokes | 5676 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5290 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5070 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,226,466 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 943 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★Darc★ | 68% | 56 |
| #2 | Max Bellington | 64% | 66 |
| #3 | Boyoyote prime | 64% | 74 |
| #4 | BlackyWhiite | 63% | 142 |
| #5 | GzVelaxy | 63% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | "ZyoN" | 59% | 46 |
| #7 | Oestrochette | 57% | 127 |
| #8 | Farouk Pinault | 57% | 104 |
| #9 | Mimi | 52% | 44 |
| #10 | Custer | 37% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BlackyWhiite | 27 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Farouk Pinault | 20 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | Oestrochette | 19 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | Custer | 6 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | Max Bellington | 5 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Farouk Pinault | 557 | 0.27 | 14 min |
| #2 | BlackyWhiite | 417 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | Oestrochette | 331 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | Max Bellington | 250 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | GzVelaxy | 232 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★Darc★ | +5.47 | 70 | 62 |
| #2 | Farouk Pinault | +1.50 | 66 | 57 |
| #3 | Frostyest | +1.37 | 73 | 42 |
| #4 | BlackyWhiite | +0.90 | 46 | 60 |
| #5 | Max Bellington | +0.46 | 61 | 56 |





