








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 686 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2394 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3859 | 52% |
| Smokes | 1920 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 639 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 944 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $524,980 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 318 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | tugg | 55% | 83 |
| #9 | AuяA | 52% | 155 |
| #10 | crackeryy | 45% | 60 |
| #11 | Nobody | 42% | 33 |
| #12 | Major Dick Bong | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oom Cyril | +3.92 | 94 | 58 |
| #2 | jerry | +3.38 | 81 | 69 |
| #3 | capital q | +3.08 | 85 | 38 |
| #4 | skrypt | +1.34 | 78 | 71 |
| #5 | crackeryy | +0.95 | 77 | 46 |





