








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 366 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,552 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2623 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3258 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3059 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2612 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,784,838 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reconz | 51% | 258 |
| #2 | Krillin | 51% | 65 |
| #3 | crunch- | 48% | 412 |
| #4 | Taco | 47% | 97 |
| #5 | TawnyricK ︻芫---------~ | 47% | 291 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | crunch- | 48% | 412 |
| #4 | Taco | 47% | 97 |
| #5 | TawnyricK ︻芫---------~ | 47% | 291 |
| #6 | Extol | 46% | 233 |
| #7 | Shifty McStabs | 41% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TawnyricK ︻芫---------~ | 18 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | crunch- | 15 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Extol | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Reconz | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Taco | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crunch- | 705 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | Extol | 418 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #3 | TawnyricK ︻芫---------~ | 362 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #4 | Reconz | 321 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | Taco | 184 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TawnyricK ︻芫---------~ | +0.37 | 78 | 55 |
| #2 | Reconz | +0.20 | 46 | 53 |
| #3 | Boxbutter | +0.11 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | Extol | +0.06 | 65 | 66 |
| #5 | Taco | -0.18 | 59 | 61 |





