








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,253 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2644 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3906 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3283 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2420 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $472,069 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ÐѲPΞ✘ƗNꞪѲ | 71% | 34 |
| #2 | ✪ M1ke | 56% | 66 |
| #3 | Vander | 53% | 179 |
| #4 | unihox | 50% | 248 |
| #5 | GreenFox | 46% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ M1ke | +2.47 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | ÐѲPΞ✘ƗNꞪѲ | +1.07 | 56 | 69 |
| #3 | klatilsons | +0.76 | 61 | 71 |
| #4 | unihox | +0.38 | 71 | 70 |
| #5 | Vander | -0.32 | 60 | 55 |





