








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 636 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 314 matches | ||
| Faceit | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,400 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5754 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6927 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6616 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5103 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,929,036 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | incertia | 63% | 30 |
| #2 | nickelalum | 51% | 218 |
| #3 | Spriggs | 46% | 67 |
| #4 | Jeff | 36% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | incertia | 63% | 30 |
| #2 | nickelalum | 51% | 218 |
| #3 | Spriggs | 46% | 67 |
| #4 | Jeff | 36% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nickelalum | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Jeff | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Spriggs | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nickelalum | 305 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #2 | Spriggs | 208 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Jeff | 102 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | incertia | 49 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | incertia | +0.93 | 72 | 56 |
| #2 | nickelalum | +0.39 | 54 | 49 |
| #3 | Spriggs | -0.46 | 56 | 56 |
| #4 | KaobeiKapy | -0.56 | 56 | 69 |
| #5 | Jeff | -1.16 | 44 | 57 |





