








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 32 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,112 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 280 | 25% |
| Smokes | 340 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 207 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 285 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $196,400 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sorry | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | pawla | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | steve | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | Lining | 44% | 32 |
| #5 | ShraMn | 43% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShraMn | 8 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | enfohip | 8 | 0.0271 |
| #3 | Kyew -iwl- | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Lining | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | pawla | 2 | 0.0180 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShraMn | 143 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | enfohip | 77 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #3 | Kyew -iwl- | 63 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Lining | 61 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | ♣ Kay9 | 53 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pawla | +4.05 | 95 | 76 |
| #2 | Sorry | +3.27 | 90 | 69 |
| #3 | enfohip | +3.20 | 72 | 73 |
| #4 | ♣ Kay9 | +1.42 | 63 | 66 |
| #5 | ShraMn | +0.76 | 68 | 63 |





