








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 288 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1764 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,611 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 462 | 18% |
| Smokes | 304 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1211 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 634 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $931,053 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 609 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubyy | 55% | 22 |
| #2 | clutchshot_ | 53% | 105 |
| #3 | Affxct | 47% | 115 |
| #4 | sinacle | 43% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubyy | 55% | 22 |
| #2 | clutchshot_ | 53% | 105 |
| #3 | Affxct | 47% | 115 |
| #4 | sinacle | 43% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sinacle | 7 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | Rubyy | 7 | 0.0161 |
| #3 | clutchshot_ | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Affxct | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clutchshot_ | 357 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | Affxct | 228 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Rubyy | 152 | 0.35 | 3 min |
| #4 | sinacle | 149 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Affxct | +3.69 | 82 | 45 |
| #2 | Rubyy | +0.87 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | clutchshot_ | +0.83 | 72 | 60 |
| #4 | 🅱🅻🆄🅴🆁🅰🆈™ | +0.03 | 45 | 36 |
| #5 | sinacle | -0.82 | 77 | 44 |





