








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 417 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2825 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2798 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2318 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1758 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1942 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,273,914 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 308 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ItsAlmightyB | 45% | 47 |
| #8 | Dylete | 44% | 34 |
| #9 | Seppy | 43% | 21 |
| #10 | Limmy | 38% | 34 |
| #11 | BOB | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Szabo666 | 13 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Sunday Tiger | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Floyd all 12 | 5 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | ItsAlmightyB | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Thatboyardee | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Szabo666 | 718 | 0.18 | 18 min |
| #2 | Sunday Tiger | 644 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #3 | Dylete | 138 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | Thatboyardee | 129 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | p34k | 127 | 0.17 | 3 min |





