








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 115 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1842 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2432 | 44% |
| Smokes | 1870 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 474 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 720 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $376,326 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 104 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jung Poop | 41% | 164 |
| #3 | ChewPopping | 40% | 42 |
| #4 | hangetsu66 | 36% | 36 |
| #5 | MustBePog | 34% | 153 |
| #6 | sullena | 25% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MustBePog | 22 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Jung Poop | 18 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | ChewPopping | 8 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | hangetsu66 | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | sullena | 2 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jung Poop | 444 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | MustBePog | 254 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | hangetsu66 | 87 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | ChewPopping | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | sullena | 32 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jung Poop | +3.69 | 66 | 53 |
| #2 | hangetsu66 | +1.10 | 69 | 39 |
| #3 | MustBePog | +0.50 | 47 | 43 |
| #4 | ChewPopping | -0.06 | 59 | 30 |
| #5 | Halfmoon66 | -3.01 | 39 | 44 |





