








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 73 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
730 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 324 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 30 | 9% |
| Smokes | 90 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 134 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 70 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $208,219 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tony | 55% | 33 |
| #2 | Sinsier | 51% | 78 |
| #3 | Spahghett | 49% | 107 |
| #4 | beepboopbonk | 47% | 97 |
| #5 | Howellman | 47% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spahghett | 17 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | beepboopbonk | 17 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | Tony | 5 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | Sinsier | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Howellman | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spahghett | 311 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | beepboopbonk | 282 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | Howellman | 106 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | Sinsier | 58 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Tony | 48 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sinsier | +5.35 | 56 | 45 |
| #2 | Tony | +5.24 | 87 | 38 |
| #3 | Spahghett | +0.83 | 38 | 50 |
| #4 | beepboopbonk | -1.38 | 21 | 48 |
| #5 | Howellman | -1.62 | 17 | 61 |





