










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 115 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 273 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 109 | 40% |
| Smokes | 53 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 72 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 39 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $164,929 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dbuttersnaps1 | 34% | 70 |
| #2 | ✦ masokitty ✦ | 29% | 14 |
| #3 | Jengels | 0% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dbuttersnaps1 | 34% | 70 |
| #2 | ✦ masokitty ✦ | 29% | 14 |
| #3 | Jengels | 0% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dbuttersnaps1 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | ✦ masokitty ✦ | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dbuttersnaps1 | 148 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | ✦ masokitty ✦ | 19 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Jengels | 17 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jengels | +1.08 | 73 | 51 |
| #2 | lipxam | -1.39 | 39 | 20 |
| #3 | ✦ masokitty ✦ | -3.11 | 25 | 45 |
| #4 | dbuttersnaps1 | -3.23 | 30 | 34 |





