








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 351 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3359 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,034 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3607 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3415 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2115 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2897 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $526,607 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 376 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xner | 18 | 0.0136 |
| #2 | DatPaladin | 10 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | 7evaN | 7 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Baguette | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Flipz38 | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | john wich | 746 | 0.34 | 23 min |
| #2 | xner | 380 | 0.29 | 10 min |
| #3 | 7evaN | 375 | 0.30 | 9 min |
| #4 | DatPaladin | 230 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | Baguette | 210 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | revs | +3.93 | 82 | 75 |
| #2 | xner | +2.71 | 63 | 72 |
| #3 | 7evaN | +2.57 | 70 | 65 |
| #4 | banny | +1.89 | 72 | 51 |
| #5 | ASU.ItsTypho | +0.94 | 79 | 68 |





