










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 665 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 326 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 147 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2730 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,383 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 917 | 7% |
| Smokes | 4231 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 4045 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 3190 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,755,644 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Luke Skywankerツ | 38% | 42 |
| #10 | MissVest | 36% | 42 |
| #11 | Şᾁdbiggieboşşツᶠᶸᶜᵏᵧₒᵤ | 31% | 36 |
| #12 | Ægte Ørn | 29% | 73 |
| #13 | JuuuicyAsFuuuuark | 24% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ægte Ørn | 202 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | Luke Skywankerツ | 117 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | Jimoverarm | 73 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Şᾁdbiggieboşşツᶠᶸᶜᵏᵧₒᵤ | 63 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | CokeDragon | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RozenGT | +1.34 | 64 | 53 |
| #2 | CokeDragon | +1.24 | 40 | 61 |
| #3 | bizzeN | +0.22 | 23 | 70 |
| #4 | JuuuicyAsFuuuuark | +0.07 | 65 | 57 |
| #5 | Şᾁdbiggieboşşツᶠᶸᶜᵏᵧₒᵤ | -0.20 | 52 | 59 |





