








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 212 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 409 matches | ||
| Faceit | 95 matches | ||
| Wingman | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,021 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7552 | 36% |
| Smokes | 5197 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4036 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4236 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,695,695 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FresHii* | 53% | 75 |
| #2 | CubY | 50% | 610 |
| #3 | Fl0wCa | 46% | 37 |
| #4 | escanoR | 43% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FresHii* | 53% | 75 |
| #2 | CubY | 50% | 610 |
| #3 | Fl0wCa | 46% | 37 |
| #4 | escanoR | 43% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CubY | 14 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | escanoR | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | FresHii* | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Fl0wCa | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CubY | 1038 | 0.09 | 28 min |
| #2 | escanoR | 109 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | FresHii* | 86 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Fl0wCa | 83 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fl0wCa | +1.65 | 79 | 64 |
| #2 | CubY | +1.38 | 69 | 64 |
| #3 | FresHii* | -0.18 | 43 | 66 |
| #4 | SMTY;. | -1.54 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | escanoR | -2.53 | 67 | 53 |





