








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 445 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 474 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4301 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,265 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2619 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4767 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3685 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2194 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,401,756 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stupor | 56% | 50 |
| #2 | _BIA_ J0K3R | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | never | 50% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stupor | 56% | 50 |
| #2 | _BIA_ J0K3R | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | never | 50% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _BIA_ J0K3R | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | never | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Stupor | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _BIA_ J0K3R | 145 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | never | 125 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Stupor | 46 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | never | +1.10 | 77 | 72 |
| #2 | _BIA_ J0K3R | +0.56 | 77 | 54 |
| #3 | Raw_Input | -0.23 | 71 | 61 |
| #4 | Stupor | -1.36 | 45 | 59 |





